


No One Likes Superman Anymore

by i_like_writing



Category: Now You See Me (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Mentions of traumatic experience for Lula, Merritt does not like rats, Mostly Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-28
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-27 05:27:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7605310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_like_writing/pseuds/i_like_writing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was exactly one thirty two in the morning, and the illusionists/magicians/thieves were asleep. Well, most of them were.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No One Likes Superman Anymore

**Author's Note:**

> And for my next trick...I will make up a Superman actor who is so terrible there's no way he could possibly have been cast in anything in real life. 
> 
> Hey everyone. I hope you like this one, it was really fun for me to write! I don't own anything except the crappy knock-off Superman (and maybe the rat under Merritt's bed.)
> 
> Title comes from "No One Likes Superman Anymore" by I Fight Dragons. It's a pretty cool song, so go listen if you haven't.

It was exactly one thirty two in the morning, and the illusionists/magicians/thieves were asleep. Well, most of them were. Some of them, like Merritt McKinney, were lying in bed trying to determine if they had really heard a rat under their bed or if it was just a stupid prank by one of the other Horsemen, probably Lula. Others, like J. Daniel Atlas, were holed up in their rooms with all the lights turned on for some reason or other. Others, like Jack and Lula, had tossed and turned and decided they couldn't sleep, and so had made their way downstairs and were now watching the random and often bad programming that happened to be on tv at such a time. So really, the only one sleeping was Dylan. 

Jack was lying on the couch, feet propped up on the coffee table, a fairly large and mostly uneaten bowl of popcorn balanced on his lap. Lula was curled up beside him, hand dipping into the bowl absentmindedly. The house was quiet for the most part, except for the loud clattering and opening and shutting of doors that could be heard over the low sounds of the tv. Daniel had been trying to master a confusing trap door trick all week, and he was determined to get it right before any of the others did. This usually resulted in him practicing incessantly at odd hours of the night (and morning). 

Was he a vampire? Lula wondered. Given his loner tendencies and penchant for pulling all-nighters even when the rest of his friends were exhausted, she thought it was a reasonable assumption. 

All joking aside, she worried about Daniel's sanity and if he ever got any sleep, but based on how the other Horsemen were going about their business as if nothing was wrong, that type of behavior wasn't entirely out of the norm for him. Still, she hoped he wouldn't suddenly freak out one day and try to kill Merritt if he messed up a card trick. 

After all, she had seen people snap over less. 

(The steel flash of a knife as it met skin and the steady torrent of blood drip drip dripping down her father's neck.)

Thrown back into unwanted memories, the illusionist's attention snapped sharply back to the scene as a loud, and pretty fake-looking, explosion broke out. A man in a skintight (but still oddly bulky, like he was wearing other clothes or padding underneath) costume ran into the frame, shielding his eyes as he presumably looked around for any survivors of the blast. 

She frowned, glancing at the screen and then back at Jack, who didn't seem to think anything was overtly wrong. Come on, it looked like late afternoon and that sorry excuse for Superman was acting like the sun was burning his eyes? No movie, even one that appeared to have been made in the 50's, could seriously be that bad. It had to be a joke.

Determined to get to the bottom of things, Lula turned her head to rest her chin on Jack's shoulder, hoping to get his attention. He turned, and decided to use their close proximity as an opportunity to kiss her forehead. She smiled, nearly forgetting Superman in an effort to snuggle closer. One accidental glance at the screen made her remember, and she practically jumped about a foot in the air, looking at the screen.

"Jesus, Lula!" Jack's eyes widened in surprise, and he luckily managed to hold onto the popcorn bowl before it toppled over and crashed to the floor. He placed it on the table in front of them, where he assumed it wouldn't be knocked over even if Lula decided to jump again. "What the hell was that?" 

"Sorry! I didn't mean to give you a heart attack," The brunette winced as she settled back down on the couch, realizing she hadn't actually voiced any of her thoughts about Superman aloud, and had scared the crap out of Jack for what he probably judged to be no discernible reason. Sure enough, he was looking at her with a mixture of concern and confusion. "I was just thinking," she continued, while he watched her warily, "is that guy supposed to be Superman?"

"Yeah." Jack answered. He visibly relaxed at her question, a little more sure she hadn't completely lost it yet. Taking note of his girlfriend's accusatory tone, he couldn't stop himself from curiously adding, "Why?"

"Nothing. It's just...I wouldn't feel very safe with him around. I mean, look at the guy! He's a disaster." Lula motioned at the screen, right as the black-and-white scenery of the previous scene faded out and was replaced by footage of a school bus on a rainy farmland. The actor in his ridiculous costume eventually showed up, and after the scene got going, began to comically over-act a dramatic situation where he had to save the bus full of children during a tornado that had suddenly appeared. He desperately tried to hold onto the bus, but a gust of wind managed to wrench it from his grasp. The actor let out a wail, reaching towards the bus with empty hands. 

"He almost ran into that pole and just stood there when that bus got blown away by the tornado when he could have-" She took a deep breath, noticing the amused look in Jack's eyes as he listened to her. Lula stopped her rant to playfully elbow him in the ribs. "You'd make a better Superman, and you can't even fly." She shifted positions, taking advantage of the popcorn bowl now being on the table to stretch her legs across Jack's lap. He ran a light hand over her knees and she sighed happily. 

"I mean, I wasn't even tempted to break up with you and run off with him instead." She playfully lamented. 

"So you won't ditch me for Superman," he teased, "That's good to know."

Lula scoffed, putting on an offended front. "Jack Wilder, I have standards!"


End file.
